Attitude adjustment

       This has been the scene at my house the past week.  The picture is 

not a great one, and doesn't quite capture the adorable chaos of having

three dogs and two people in a relatively small space for days on end.

Thunder, the big guy in the front, has been staying with me while his

"parents" are on a cruise, as they have kept Hurley for me on previous

vacations.  The little white fuzzball is Pachouli, my new roommate's

dog.  We have had quite a rowdy household these past few days.  And I

have relished (almost) every moment of it.  

       Hard as it is to believe,  Hurley has been with me only a little over a 

year.  Before that, I had been on my own for a very long time.  For years 

and years, it was just me, and I got used to it.  With Hurley, I was reintroduced 

to the joy of being part of a "we."  This year, that "we" has grown to include

Connie and Pachouli.  The roommate arrangement was born of financial

necessity, and was only supposed to be for a few months.  I had no

idea that I would like having another human and dog in the house so

much that I would want them to stay, not just for the rental income,

but for the companionship.  Simply having someone else there to enjoy

TV shows or cook a meal together or ask, "How was your day?" is

something I had almost forgotten.  Now I like getting used to it

again, so much so that our "we" has decided to stay together, at least

for the rest of 2012.  Maybe by then, I will have found a "he" to form

another kind of "we."  Who knows?  Anything seems possible when the

year is still so young.

SS

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I should have taken a "before" picture.  My desk, previously piled with books, reading glasses, papers, bills, earrings, receipts, notebooks, lists, hair clips, recipes, markers, clipboards, post-its, and tiny Polly Pockets, is clean!  It's simply clear, uncluttered space.  Purged, dusted, organized.  

I'm working my way through the house with a quote from William Morris in mind.  “Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.” Hmm,  I could be getting rid of a lot of stuff.  

AF 

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Attitude Adjustment

      I have this photo at work. When I look at it, it brings me peace. I don't know if it's the layers of green or the memory of a family visit to the botanical gardens at Riverbanks Zoo, but whatever the appeal, it enables me to stop, breathe and slip into the mystery of something that deeply resonates within that has nothing to do with deadlines or performance or work or even thought. 

      I call it a joy catcher, and I use many things as such including quotes and prayers that I collect. I ran across this prayer this week and thought what a beautiful attitude adjustment, a reminder that sometimes what I need most in a harried day, is a dose of spirit, a chance to be filled with something other than thoughts of me, me, me.  It's like a having a soothing cup of tea, with a touch of honey and mint. Everything seems better. More bearable somehow.

 

      Father Mychal's prayer

Lord, take me where you want me to go

Let me meet whom you want me to meet

Tell me what you want me to say

And keep me out of your way.

       It's a refreshing thought.

DB

Schadenfreude, a winter dandelion, and a finish.

Schadenfreude

      When I ask my kids to read cooking directions in the fine print on food containers, they look at me as if I’m crazy, wondering if I’ve forgotten how to read. Though I realize aging is inevitable, I’ve been surprised how irritated I’ve been about losing something I’ve taken for granted all my life. I don’t know who this person is wearing granny glasses to read, even though the glasses are chic-colored fashion items. The worst thing is I have two older friends, who are tickled pink that I’ve reached this stage. I mean roll-in-the-floor-laugh kind of happy when they see me pull out the glasses to read a menu.

      It brings to mind the old German idea of Schadenfreude, which means to gloat over someone’s misfortunes. Of course, we all do it at times, but still, really? I have to put up with loss of eyesight, my youthful self-image and now this … mean-spiritedness?

      I believe aging is God’s way of refining us, humbling us in the last length of life. It is the great equalizer. I’d say I hope these friends have to get hearing aids or scooters or whatever the latest aging gadget is before I do, but then that would be too Schadenfreude.

DB

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What are you doing there?

Bizarre burst of color in January,

Brave and beautiful, weed though you are.

The sunshine must have misled you.

Your season is still far away.

You couldn't stand it, I think,

Sleeping away these April-ish days

Safe underground with other growing things.

You took your chance,

Carpe'd this diem, and now what?

I fear the cold will return soon

To put an end to your rebellious blooming.

How long is the average life of a dandelion?

You may not last that long, risk-taker.

But you are here now, drinking in the sunlight,

Basking in the warmth the others have missed.

I think I will forget my errands today.

I should be outside

Enjoying pseudo-spring while it lasts.

I can go off-book for awhile,

Take some risks

While they're mine for the taking.

Thank you for reminding me

With the audacity of a yellow flower in winter.

SS

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       “And don’t drop your medal when they give it to you in the finish chute.  You’ll be tired but hang on to it.”  concluded Maryanne, my hairstylist and running guru after a haircut and an hour’s worth of invaluable training advice.   

       What? I get a medal? 

       One of the coolest things about running a half marathon is this:  If you finish, you get a medal.  You don’t have to finish in the top ten or even the top three for your age group (although there are extra prizes if you do).  You just have to cross the finish line on your feet and there you have it.   A shiny gold, blue and green medal. 

      So thanks to all of my friends who asked about my training, put up with my dramatics, and cheered me on as I prepared for the Charleston Half Marathon.  And special thanks to Maryanne for advice on everything from arm warmers to body glide; to Julie and Jordan for cheers from the side of the road; to Lynne, my friend and encourager who navigated a maze of blocked roads to check on me at miles 4 and 8 and to cheer me on at the finish;  and, of course, to Don who put up with months of training, complaining, and obsessing, who got up before dawn to get me to the starting line, nearly froze to death on his bike at the start to get some pictures, and waited patiently at the finish while I stood in line for my post-race shrimp and grits.   

     You don’t make it to the finish line without friends.

AF